Lydia: Dating & Relationships Q&A

We caught up with Lydia, a real 47 Skin customer, to talk honestly about how skin struggles can shape confidence, dating and relationships. From feeling like her skin was “the elephant in the room” to tailoring dates around lighting and cancelling plans when she didn’t feel comfortable, Lydia shares what it was really like living, and dating, with redness, spots and blemishes.

How did skin struggles affect your confidence over the years?

Massively. As a teenager, I felt like my skin's really red. Everyone's looking at me. Why is my skin like this? I can't cover it.

Did people ever comment on your skin and how did that stay with you?

I did have the odd comment of ‘why is your nose so red’? Or ‘what's wrong with your nose?’ People would compare me to those old gentlemen that have drunk alcohol their whole life and have bulbous noses that are really red. And people would say ‘is that what you've got?’

Did you ever feel like you had to address your skin before anyone else did?

I do feel like often it's the elephant in the room. So I often address it before anyone else does because I want to squash that. I feel like I've got to bring it into conversation. 

How has your skin impacted dates?

My skin is always a barrier, but thank goodness for makeup. I would sort of tailor dates and things to suit me and my skin. If we were going to a restaurant or to a bar, I would pick the darkest restaurant or bar with the lowest lighting possible because the thought of having a light directly on my face was just a big no for me.

Would you ever cancel a date if you weren’t happy with how your skin looked?

Yeah, if I was getting ready and I wasn't happy with my makeup or had a specific spot or blemish that I wasn't happy with, then yeah, I would cancel the date.

Did you ever bring up your skin early when dating someone new?

I think I've always addressed it before anybody else can. If I felt that my skin was red or that I had any obvious spots, then I would just mention it. It often feels like in relationships and dates that your skin's a third wheel. So for me, I'd rather just tackle that head on and speak about it.

How did skin impact intimacy and confidence in your relationship after having children?

When you have a baby your body changes massively. Your relationship changes massively. You're getting no sleep, everything's harder. Then on top of that, to have a face full of spots, redness and blemishes. It's so tricky. Then the last thing you want to do is be romantic with your partner because you just feel like I'm not who I was before now.

Since finding 47 Skin, how has your relationship and how you feel getting ready for dates changed?

Now getting ready for a day or night out is just so much more enjoyable. I've always loved makeup. I've had to love makeup for my whole life because that's what's helped me cover up. But now being able to apply it to a fresh, clean canvas that's got minimal spots and blemishes, it's so lovely. And I don't need to do that anymore… I will be makeup free the whole day. I don't mind who turns up… they can see my skin now because it's better and I don't need to hide it.

What advice would you give someone with skin insecurity?

Just be yourself. Your skin isn’t everything. It’s about your personality and your interests and what you enjoy doing… it's not about what you look like. So, be confident. And if they don't love you, then they're not the right person.